The End is Near......

The end of school that is.  And I cannot wait.  If you work or ever have worked in a school (the actual position does NOT matter) then you know what I am talking about.  Each one of us has a different and unique perspective on how our job is difficult at the end of the school year.  Some of us are taking 26 wild 6 & 7 year olds to a zoo with approximately 2789 other kids, expecting them to be "nice" and "behave" and "stay together".  A teacher knows better.  Herding cats would be a WHOLE lot easier.  A teacher's best hope is to divide them up in small groups, with a responsible adult, and pray that person (or parent who is discovering exactly how bad their kid REALLY is) doesn't completely lose their cool and "lose" a problem child in the monkey exhibit.  That's the reason older kids don't go.  Half of them never are heard from again.

In the high school, happy hour is almost required EVERY night for the first two weeks of May, or until the graduating seniors leave.  For some reason, a teen that has not paid one bit of attention all year, turned in exactly 2.5 papers and slept in all his classes, suddenly realizes that he is NOT GOING TO GRADUATE and has failed the classes he slept in!!  Surprise! Oh no!  It's a tragedy.  I LOVE the parents that call and want to know if their child could do some "extra credit" and make up 8 1/2 months of the little darling's school year.  I think for this reason alone, a Prozac salt lick in the staff lounge should be financed by taxpayer money. 

The kids act like they have no sense.  One of our little darlings drove his car, well, actually fish-tailed his car about 100 feet and then drove it over a median, completely breaking off the axle and leaving it high centered on the median.  IN THE PARKING LOT. 

If you work here and are female, you know that you have time to shave only one leg a day.  Or week.  You start a petition for a coffee I.V drip for each teacher. That your family can actually get sick of eating out.  Drive through, that is.  No one actually sits down.  And when you pull through McDonald's, they greet you by name like Norm! on Cheers.  Your yard is 3 feet tall because you're going to every "senior breakfast, senior awards dinner and senior banquet" and field day, field trip, working track meets and musicals.  Yep.  No time. 

But the end is near...... it's near people.  And whether you're a student or teacher or custodian, you are waiting with baited breath for summer.... I know I am!